Of a Kunst: Our Party-Going Correspondent Does Halloween

Sarah Kunst's personal tagline: I probably met you at a party. She goes to a lot of them and throws a lot of them. She knows how to curate a guest list and work a room—and is the perfect combination of articulate and judge-y to parlay all of her experience into an advice column for those of us who sometimes fall asleep on the couch to FNL marathons. Or, as she’d put it, she’s doing us a favor.

Q: I have a Halloween date—fourth date to be exact. What costume do I wear to avoid a possible walk of shame while dressed in full costume regalia? I want to look cute but respectable!

A: Sexual politics aside, when you crawl out of some dude’s bed and hoof it home at 10a dressed as a sexy bumblebee, there ain’t no pride in that stride. Avoid becoming a total Halloween cliche by planning ahead.

A good Halloween costume requires two things: a culturally relevant theme and more skin than you’d normally show. Think of it this way: The cuter you are now, the more likely you’ll land the cover of “yourmomwashot.tumblr.com: 25th Anniversary Edition.”

Three months ago when looking for costume inspiration, I would have said, “Sultry horsemaning!” But that’s so last meme. Now, it’s all about Waldobombing-gone-sexy. The things to wear:

Clockwise from top left:

+ Who wears short shorts? Waldo wears (One Teaspoon) short shorts.

+ Warby Parker's Fillmore glasses are both hipster-chic and Waldo-approved.

+ Thomas Sires's sweet striped Evelyne shirt is one of only 22 in the world, so you're sure to be a rare find.

+ And to keep the not-so-nice theme going: Charlotte Olympia CFM shoes. By night, they read “bad girl,” and by day, they say, “What! I’m short!”

No need to thank us for saving your dignity. —sarah

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