The Insider: Sloane Crosley

We’ve been borderline obsessed with Sloane Crosley since simply hearing the title of her first book, I Was Told There’d Be Cake, so it’s no wonder the writer and all-around funny woman has only continued to woo us with her words and wisdom. Even if you’re a mega fan who’s well-versed in her miniature chicken collaboration, we betchya don’t know what she swears by on freezing cold winter days—or about the fuzzy skeletons she’s hiding in her closet. —carlye wisel

Q: What’s the last great thing you read?
A: I had minor heart palpitations reading Victor Zapana’s New Yorker essay, “Shaken.”

Q: As a writer—Twitter: yay or nay?
A: “Yay” but a kind of sarcastic fading “yaaaaay.”

Q: What three things are really buggin’ you these days?
A: My instinct here is to suggest that you don’t have enough time to listen to the list (am I right or am I right?), but not much comes to mind. I don’t like ombre hair. I don’t like music snobs. I don’t like the elevation of picky food consumption to the level of opera. I don’t like the obsession with things that no longer exist and yet I persist in telling people I “left a message on your answering machine.” I don’t like the weird spare change on my MetroCard or that we kind of skipped Fall this year. But overall? Obama won, family Thanksgiving was enjoyable, the country has a sex scandal to follow, and my power is back on.

Q: How would you describe your style?
A: Like Rainbow Brite and Wednesday Addams got in a fight and Rainbow Brite won.

Q: If you could have access to anyone else’s wardrobe, whose would you choose? Why?
A: I don’t know if I have one person. If someone sticks out at me at a party or on the street, it generally turns out that person is a stylist. Which makes me feel good about my fashion “eye” for half a second before I realize I’m rather hopeless by comparison. In the celebrity ether? Kate Moss. In real time? My friend Charlotte Kidd is always really well dressed.

Q: What’s your go-to, I-have-to-be-somewhere-in-10-minutes-and-look-dope outfit?
A: Black tights, high-waisted shorts, tall boots, and a bright silk shirt.

Q: Is there anything hanging in your closet that you’ve never had the guts to wear?
A: Yes. I didn’t feel like taking a picture so I just plugged in “Philippe Adec green coat” to Google and found this. Looks like someone is selling theirs on eBay so it too can be yours if you want it. I even had mine tailored at one point, and I still can’t wear it without feeling like Oscar the Grouch. And I guess I’d have to wear it with all black and international spy heels? I have no idea.

Q: What warm or cozy items do you rely on to get you through winter?
A: A scarf by A Peace Treaty that’s really a giant, soft blanky masquerading as a scarf.

Q: If you had a uniform, what would it be?
A: Air traffic controller or medical doctor.

Want more? Check out our whole crop o’ insiders, right this way…

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Of a Kind

Julia Chaplin, the writer who coined the term gypset, now has a line of dresses and sarongs named for the word of her invention. Because if anyone knows what to wear to continent hop with just a carry-on, it’s her. —erica

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Known Entities: Hunter S. Thompson

The godfather of Gonzo journalism would have been an icon if he did his fear and loathing in jeans and T-shirts, but his out-there, life’s-a-vacation look certainly adds to his allure. Also, if you in any way aspire to this sort of eccentric aesthetic, start growing your hat collection, stat. —erica

Dark Mosley Tribes aviators, to take it all in (and hide any indication of what else you’ve been ingesting).

A wild ‘n crazy Bill Tornade shirt, to let your “Freak Power” flag fly.

A cuff watch by Black Dice—to count down the minutes til Nixon’s out of office.

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